Let’s keep the same energy.

Yesterday, I talked about ERG leaders who aren’t meeting expectations and what program managers need to do about it. And yes, that conversation needed to happen. But this goes both ways, because the reality is not every ERG Program Manager is great either. And ERG leaders feel that. They feel when there’s no direction, when expectations are unclear, when everything is reactive instead of structured, and when they’re being asked to “figure it out” instead of being supported.

There’s a real disconnect happening in a lot of ERG programs right now. Program Managers feel like leaders aren’t executing. Leaders feel like Program Managers aren’t supporting. And the truth is, both sides are kind of right. What we’re seeing across the board is a lack of structure, a lack of clarity, and a lack of shared understanding of what this program is actually supposed to be. So if you’re an ERG leader sitting there thinking, “I’m trying, but this program is a mess,” you’re not alone.

Now, some context, not an excuse. Most ERG Program Managers were not trained for this role. They were promoted into it, handed the program, or asked to figure it out as they went. There’s no standard playbook, no formal onboarding, and no clear definition of what “good” looks like. So yes, there is a learning curve. But this is still a paid role, and at some point we have to move from figuring it out to getting it right. Because ERG leaders are volunteers, and it’s not fair for volunteers to carry the weight of a program that hasn’t been structured properly.

If you’re dealing with a Program Manager who doesn’t give clear direction, changes expectations constantly, doesn’t provide tools or processes, or expects you to just “run with it,” you’re not crazy for feeling frustrated. But you still have to navigate it strategically, not emotionally. That starts with getting clarity where there is none. Instead of waiting for direction, ask for it directly. Ask what success actually looks like for the ERG this quarter. Ask what the minimum expectations are for your role. Ask what actually needs to get done versus what is optional.

And more specifically, ask them to define the MVQ, the minimum viable quarter. That means they should be able to answer in one sentence what must be done this quarter for your ERG to be considered successful. If they cannot answer that clearly, you are going to struggle. Because you’ve never been given a real definition of success to operate against. And the reality is, they probably don’t know. You’ll often get a fluff answer like, “just do what works for your group,” or “we don’t want to over-direct you.” That is an excuse. You need clarity. Clarity is kindness. So ask for it directly.

And once you have that clarity, don’t over-program. If you don’t want to burn out, don’t overdo it. Hit the minimum. Execute it well. And be intentional about anything you add beyond that.

At the same time, don’t over-function. This is where a lot of ERG leaders get stuck. When there’s no structure, you try to compensate. You do more, you overbuild, and you try to fix the gaps. Now you’re doing your role and theirs. That’s how burnout happens. Just because there’s a gap doesn’t mean it’s yours to fill. You have to be intentional about what you take on and what you don’t.

It also helps to document what’s happening. Not in a defensive way, but in a clarity way. Keep track of what you were told, what you delivered, and what changed. When things feel inconsistent, having that record makes it easier to reset expectations and have a grounded conversation.

And yes, at some point, you should have the conversation. It doesn’t have to be dramatic. It can be simple. Let them know you want to succeed in the role, but you need clearer expectations and more structure to do that effectively. You’re not attacking them. You’re trying to create alignment so the program can work.

The hard truth is, even with all of this, there are some Program Managers who won’t change. And that’s just as real as leaders who won’t step up. So at that point, you have to make a decision. Do you stay in the role and operate within the reality of the program, adjust your level of effort, or step back entirely? Because just like Program Managers shouldn’t carry misaligned leaders, leaders shouldn’t carry a broken system either.

It’s time to raise the standard on both sides. Program Managers need to lead better, and ERG leaders (I’m referencing the ones who have been provided the support they need) need to execute. The only way this works is if both are willing to be honest about where things aren’t working.

More to come,

✌🏿The ERG Homegirl